Permanent

The profuse weight of loneliness is draped around my shoulders

A shroud of emptiness only making my bones colder

I’m heavily burdened with aching hollowness at the center of my chest

Broken promises and meaningless words sit in the gaping hole of my breast

I’m amidst a wave of faces, many I try and fail to emulate

Trying on a mask of normalcy hoping to absorb and mutate

But no matter how many new skins I clothe my body in

I can’t deceive myself from what really lies within

I’m molting this outer shell and accepting my desolate existence

Watching my reality flow more smoothly without my vain resistance

It was always going to be this way, whether it’s called kismet or fate

Fighting, contending, struggling and failing to make this destiny abate

I ostracized myself, forsaken by no one but the voices in my head

They grew louder, eclipsing all else, and I followed where they led

Now I stand among them, shedding my denial and embracing this death

Suicide is permanent, too late now to regret or second guess

© Chelsie Cummings 2016

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